Saturday, December 09, 2006

Human Psychology: Part3 -- Teenage

Teenage - the period of life with hard feelings. This is the stage at which most of the human won’t get care and support from their family and relatives. This is prevalent at least in rural India. And I see most of the teenagers has to fight with the surroundings and relatives, just because of the age difference and the people in 20’s will consider teenagers as “don’t touchable” creatures – I mean they don’t like to interact freely. There is a psychological reason behind all of these. A person of 16 years old sometimes considered as child and in some other situations, people expect an adult’s behavior from the same person. So this generates a deep confusion in that person, he don’t really know how to manage situations.

I understand the difference in behavior and manner among boy and girl differ drastically during teenage. I mean, after teenage people set different bench marks to measure boy’s and girl’s behavior. During childhood they are evaluated from the same platform – simple criteria – that is they are child and developing. And it is a fact that, usually girls are accepted to the community fast compared to boys. There are many reasons for that, important one is; they are matured earlier than boys.

I think, in the case of girls, family and relatives are ready to accept, understand and care her, but she thinks that is not fare. And it takes some time to settle this procedure. She is needs a lot of care and support from others since she is suffering from physical changes and the accompanied mental problems.

As a boy, I personally had lot of thoughts in my teenage. Most of the time people won’t try to understand us and our feelings. And because of the age, we don’t know why they are behaving like that. I would call it a fantastic process, in which a teenager learn the situation around as a watcher, he perceives things and realize how should I interact with the person, tries some practical methods, some times they fail and finally he/she develops the skill of behavior- how to handle situations. This is the process of personality development too.

Remember that mental peace is bigger than any thing. And for a teenager a thought or feeling lasts for more time than a child. In many cases it takes much time to correct or reshape one emotion. He/she spends 40% of his/her time in thinking about this sensitive issue. I have spent time in my teenage to device how should I react tomorrow to handle some meetings- I thought of what all things I should ask, to whom etc.

It is a reality that, more of the parents don’t give mental support to a teenager. They will just set boundaries and bench marks around them, which they are not supposed to cross. I understand a great thing here: you can set boundaries, but that boundaries have to be set with the support. It has to be clear to them that, those are for their good and there is no fight among a teenager and their parents – actually parents have to make it vivid. If you could do this, sure they will behave according to your expectations. If you give support and care, they will be with you and among you. Otherwise, they will go and search for a person or team which gives this support. This support includes not only material support; most important part is mental support.

First thing that parents have to do is detecting their crossing to their teenage from childhood. This will be possible if you had a good relationship with your child in their childhood. Many things are there, that you have to be aware of and apply at this stage,

1. Interaction with your child is the first thing. Remember, even though they have entered their teenage, still you are considering them as your child. It will be like that if you are a true parent.

2. Involve them in all activities. May be in taking a common family decision, ask their open opinions, reasons for that, acknowledge them with compliments if they presented a good idea before you etc. Ask them about their future plans in their studies, their opinion about younger sister’s/brother’s future studies; ask them about your own behavior in various situations etc. Through all these you are developing a good mutual relationship your child.

3. If teenager is eldest of your children, find time to spend alone with him/her without your other children and speak and discuss serious things like, how can you mange the behaviors of other children. Ask them the approach to follow, they can tell a lot, since they really feel a lot of things like that. This will also help to feel him/her that he/she is responsible in your family like their parents. The most suitable time is at night when all other went to bed.

4. Spouses can also speak personally with the teenager about their partner. This will help them to understand he various problems in practical life, how to tackle them, how man and woman differ in their behavior and dealings etc.

5. If teenager is not the eldest, try to understand him, how the hierarchy works in a family, how their elders care them and what they are supposed to give back.

6. Allow them to correct you if they spot any misbehavior in you. There are a lot of changes that happen in each individual with age and in many cases an individual won’t monitor how ones behavior changes with time. There are many reasons for this change in behavior… with age our mind sets change a little, change in body, diseases etc matters.

7. Most of the mothers will be selfish and proud about their children and family. This is a natural feeling deriving out of maternal mind. But you have to control and understand that in many situations, these feelings prevail over your personality. We can’t blame them; they are not doing it intentionally. But a good mother should be able to realize that I have to manage her maternal feelings suitably. A teenager watches you closely.

8. Give them chances to interact and mingle among the relatives and if possible it is better if they have a close friend from your relatives itself. Teach them the behavior in relations and the boundaries that we have to keep to maintain a peaceful society. You have to restrict their mood over girl or boy friend, and teach them the setup of a family and how a sound society is build on moral values. This doesn’t mean that they should be restricted from talking to opposite sex. But give them tips on how to behave.

9. I personally feel that, teenager should spend most of the time in their family and problems related to their relatives. Teach them to comprehend how others behave, why they behaved like that etc. It will be a great loss, if they spend this time in thinking about a practical marriage life now and their partner, which they see through a girl or boy friend. There they are really selfish; they will do any thing for their friend without looking in to truth or false. Else, they have to learn how relations work, how to behave to their partners, how to tackle problems among relatives that mainly happen due to ego clashes etc. They will surely learn things from all these and try to apply them, it s natural. But for that they don’t need a intimate gf or bf. And later, when time comes, they can marry. You can even explain this strategy to them.

10. Find some time for a trip or journey to some where with your family alone. Enjoy the time, interact and understand how each one is bounded to others in your family. And in occasions where all of your relatives attend, they will realize that in these situations, time should be spent to interact with others than involving in your own family interactions. This teaches that “we have to consider others and others feelings than ours”. And later you can discuss what all things happened in that meeting, once you are back at home.

11. While eating food, try to do it in group, create situations here to discuss open topics. Parents can discuss about things they like most, future plans for the trip, parents childhood life etc. In all these you can ask their opinion and conclusion. And remember to discuss various topics, diversity keeps them interested.

There are lots more things parents can do and test at this stage. You have to find them out and apply tactically. Sure, sure, sure; that will be reflected in your child’s life, and that will be fruitful for you too. They will support and understand you in your hardships.

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

Ramanagaram Trip

Last Saturday[2nd Dec,2006] we, a group of 12, went on a trip to Ramanagaram. The spot is around 50 kilometer away from Banagalore city along Mysore road. We started by 12.30 pm from Bangalore and reached Basavana Pura by 2’o clock. The trip was “outsourced” and so our organizer Lalit had arranged lunch at the base camp Thimayya Academy. We played volleyball for one hour; it was my longest volleyball practice. After that we did Obstacle River crossing, sorry there was no water underneath, but we could experience a flavor of what and how people do that.

Along with our instructor, we went for chimney climbing. The location is full of rocks and shrubs. Those rocks are too gigantic in size and attractive in shape. We could see huge rocks tempting to fall down. It was adventurous to walk and jump form rock to rock along with the thorny plants. Some times rocks revenged me pretending that they are strong enough to hold my foot steps, but they toppled when I stepped on them. There is a special spot for chimney climbing. This activity was an unexpected one. There are two parallel rocks separated by around 50cms, we have to climb up between those rocks using our arms, back, knees and legs… execution algorithm is some thing like this… lock yourself using foot and knees and move up by putting weight on your palms along with sliding on your back. My shirt torn as it pressed over the rough rock. There was a man who protect us from falling down, he hold the thread which is tied to our waist. The separation between the rocks is more at the top and it was difficult and interesting to tackle the last step.

Next item was rappelling. By this time, sun had shut off its lights, but moon was there as a torch for us. It was almost full moon. The location and the arrangement of the rock are too cute. The rock is almost 150 foot in height and rough. First interesting thing is that, there is a sloppy way to climb up the rock. Once we reach there, we put ourselves to a seat belt kind of thing, which will be hooked to a long rope running down the rock to the ground. Instructor created a free-lock arrangement with the rope which we can control while we move down. Arrangement was done to do this two at a time. We have to lean back and apply force back to move down the rock. I was really amazed at the way human tackle difficulties with tactics. Here the idea was some tricks with knots. If we want to stop on the way down, we have to just hold the thread allocated to your left and right arms. And the scariest moment was when I started my descending where we gradually change from horizontal orientation to vertical orientation.

Next item was the most dreamt one when I decided to go to Ramanagaram…night trekking. We decided to walk through the reserved forest. We had two torches with us along with some good “torchy” mobiles. Instructor led the pack, it was around 7 pm by that time and it was completely dark. Instructor cautioned us that Ramanagaram is famous for snakes especially vipers. The path was full of shrubs and bamboos. Though we couldn’t see any animals and creatures, we enjoyed the walk, since we expected anything in front of us at each moment. We walked for around 45 minutes and at last we reached near the base camp. Time was 8.30 pm.

Compared to Coorg trek, this time the scene was of rocky touch, looks like they are balancing the earth in some way. And their surface is clean without any plants on them, which felt that they are proud and rough.

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Human Psychology: Part2 -- Childhood

Childhood is the phase at which baby start to apply his acquired knowledge and explore more from his surroundings. At this age, he will try to mingle more with others and other situations, he can think of doing some things of his own interests. Earlier he was playing with a ball just because you gave him that ball. But now, he has his own internal motivation to play. He came to know about it since you taught him how to play with a ball. Just like this, he will try to discover more upon any teaching that you made. So if you had laid some building stones for good works, he will start “research” of his own. So we are succeeded depending on how you introduced him to various things during those early stages. Normally all these changes can be observed after two years itself.

Let’s talk about children of age from two years to ten years. I observe that during this time child will be considered as a baby, parents and others will grant them some mercy for their bad actions even if at first we may scold them and we will watch them surprisingly. Sure there can be difference in the age span [2 to 10] where we watch this kind of opinion, depending on various factors (presence of brothers or sisters, status of family, relationship between father and mother etc).

At this stage, there are many things that a family member has to keep in mind while mingling with a child.

1. If you are a parent, listen, listen and listen to your child. Your child has many things to share with you, his knowledge is expanding day by day and he is over flowing with new ideas. Surely, support and guidance is needed to align, some times correct and many times to add more to that.

2. Let your child fight with your elder children (if any), unless it is not crossing the limits. That will help to understand the beauty and hardships of love and care. Through fight you can teach many things, in some cases, child may be short tempered that he can’t control situations. Teach manners in those cases. You can teach forgiveness among relations. The main focus should be to depict alliance with truth.

3. Help and guide them in studies. You are the first teacher and you can become a better teacher than their school teacher. This is true for all topics that she learns including behavior and science! Develop a good relationship with your child in study room. Here you can teach many things: don’t threaten her by talking about exams.

4. Remember, most of the children at this age undergo lot of mental stresses just because of their studies. They are scared about their parents, how will they face their friends in case of being behind in rank list etc. A desire to learn has to be developed in them and the motivation should be natural, they have to study naturally. They shouldn’t study through compulsion. If you had been guiding them from their early ages, this won’t be a difficult task.

5. So how much busy you are, find some time to spend with her, on her studies and general activities. If you are that much busy, you may do it on weekly basis.

6. Involve in simple discussions that will increase his confidence in the family relationships. For example, ask him when shall we go out for a one day tour? This won’t influence our timing much, but it will be a great thing for him, as you have considered his opinion. Updating things and decisions is another portion of it. Do this in all possible situations. Even your smallest kid has the right to involve in your decisions. If you do this, he will automatically discuss his joys and sorrows with you and that a great bond that any parent dreams. Ask with any human being who keep this kind of relationship with his/her parents, surely he/she would have felt similar kind of approach from his/her parents in his childhood days. So there is nothing miraculous in relationships, it is a give and take mechanism!

7. If you expect some manners in her dressing, introduce it in early stages, later it will be difficult to initiate and change, once she gets too used to it.

8. Don’t compare your child with other child. Each human being is unique in nature and interests. If you want to motivate your child citing some others example do it tactically without hurting.

9. Never say “I don’t love you” or “I don’t love you”, even if you correct it later, that will be a shock to them. Once you do it, they will expect it from you in future too and it is a feeling of being insecure.

10. Take your own initiative and interest to discuss things that he likes most. This is a form of support and care that you are offering to him.

11. Elder brother(s) and sister(s) can discuss family matters and even analyze their parents behavior and teach them why their parent behaved that way in that particular instant, this is a starting for teaching psychology.

12. Discuss general issues as much as possible with your child. This will help to understand how he is fortunate to have the current surroundings and he will be empathic to others.

13. In most of the above cases, those can be kicked off by other family members too other than parents.

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Human Psychology: Part1-- First four years

Human rarely study human psychology! This is a truth in our society, especially in Indian communities. I see a huge amount of space to fit this idea in our families. One important thing is, understanding and learning from relations and contacts and keep thinking about how others think, I meant positively.

If you analyze; those children to whom their parents are open, are peaceful, talented and confident in their actions. There is nothing wonderful in this, all human being need care and support and he/she always tries to get it through some means. The kind of open approach among the family members is not to be introduced one day, but it has to be cultivated step by step. In this modern age, people find less time to interact with their beloved ones and now it has become a custom of keeping in touch thorough some simple enquiries. It is shocking that even the family members won’t get enough time to spend for an open talk.

A human being is developed in stages though the lesson learned and experiences till this time. From them the behavior of a human being is evolved and so environment around and the situations surrounding influence a lot. All these portray the importance of understanding psychology in parenting. Although we understand that, situations and environments through out ones life influence much in that person’s behavior and habit, many of the situations and surroundings are uncontrollable. But, if you think quietly, there are a lot of things that we can handle carefully and create positive situations for our kid. I used “creating positive situations” intentionally. There are many things that we do intentionally, just to train our children. This idea of “creating situations” emerges from the fact that, habits can be taught, and most importantly, good habits has to be taught instead child will try to learn some bad habits from some one else. The simple principle behind this is, mind of a child is like a slate, and any one can write on to it, best parent will ensure that he/she has written or scrapped on that with good things at the earliest.

I personally feel that, more than 50% percentage of ones life can be influenced by those people’s parents, family, relatives and the surroundings. Means, we can even predict what he/she will become in future, what type of attachment he/she will have with his/her family in his old age after marriage etc. And it is a fact that a great portion of our children suffer from mental stress, just because they don’t have anyone to share their feelings at their early ages. I have observed that, children tends to search for companies just to get relieved and discuss their favorite areas of interest, but during this attempt, there is a chance for getting in to some bad groups.

Each of our family members can contribute many things here,

1. First thing is to understand and realize that care and support in your children’s day to day life has to do many things to your child’s life on this earth. And always keep your mind open to know and watch their every moments. If you are a parent, I feel that, you can easily monitor and influence your child, till he/she becomes 20 years old. I am hundred percentages sure, you can expect a lot from your child if you have trained and considered positively. There is nothing to worry in this, but you have to be vigilant enough to balance your actions and decisions on your child since your child is constantly watching you, to perceive things and develop his/her behavior.

2. In the first two years after child birth, child has to be with parents. In these days parents can train them a lot. Remember baby is watching you, your words and your relations with your spouse. During this time child will be more interactive with you, use those moments to teach love, affection and importance of care. Avoid quarrels and tensions at home; find time to spend with your child.

3. Between two to four years, is the time at which a major portion of child’s brain development. So it is an important time to be scheduled with guidance. Give time to,

i) Interact with you and listen his/her imaginations through words.
ii) Ask simple thought questions of why and how, just to develop child’s thinking patterns. Remember, we have to stimulate the thinking neurons.
iii) Give sufficient and reliable answers to your child’s questions, even if you feel the questions are silly. Child is thinking in and around his/her small world.
iv) Assign simple tasks through games. There are many things that you can try here. For example: cutting pictures from old color news papers and pasting them with gum on a chart, drawing in a large chart paper, maintain a book for general activities [ I had one, the book I admire a lot!!], showing pictures from a book and giving some explanations about it [for eg, show peacock in picture and explain some things about the bird – this will help to develop interest in animals], pasting a white paper on the wall near to your bed where your child sleep, simple word and picture games etc.
v) Assign some serious tasks so that your child will be aware of responsibility and importance of time in this life.
vi) If you want to develop some special behavior in your child, that is difficult to introduce at the early stage, do that particular thing in front of him and discuss about it and involve the child in some way. Sure your child will try to understand and follow it.
vii) Individually recognize your child for any good activity. But to prevent self esteem in a group of kids, recognize other children too while he/she is there in that group.
viii) Scold them tactically, you may keep not talking for some time and later explain your child why you did like that. This will help to understand what kind of behavior you are expecting.
ix) Tell them stories in bed; stop intentionally in between and ask them to complete it.
x) Ask the things happen on each day, with whom they meet today etc. This will help to develop the attachment with you. Child may complain and note behavior from some persons, guide and instruct your child positively in these situations.
xi) Tell and ask some thing about your wife/husband in her/his absence, so that your child can understand the relationship and care among spouses and how the whole family is building up.
xii) Avoid discussing things that your child don’t like and stress him/her. And if really want to eliminate that particular thing from your child, do it through situations, not just by quarrelling with your child through words.
xiii) Cultivate the habit of observation by bringing things and moments to your child’s notice. For example, you can show them the beauty of a leaf jumping in a gentle breeze.
xiv) Find time to interact with other family and relatives to teach your child manners in relationships.
xv) Find time to interact with your child and spouse, so that your child can understand how eager his /her parents to share things on him/her are. This will also help to get a feel that, both of my parents are caring.

Monday, November 13, 2006

Coorg Trek

On last Saturday [Nov 11, 2006] we, a group of 21, trekked to “Tadiyandamol ” peak in Coorg hills. It is the second highest peak in Karnataka which is 1751 meters above the sea level. We started our journey from Kembagowda bus station Bangalore. Journey to Madikkeri was a 6 hour over night experience. We reached there by 5’o clock morning. After doing refreshments, took bus to Napoklu.. bus passed Kekkebe and we had to get down at palace bus stop, its around 5 minutes after Kekkebe. We couldn’t see any shops in this bus stop, we knew this earlier and we had stocked enough food.

We started walking at 8.45 morning… out first base station was palace; history says that it was built in 17’s. We resumed our journey after spending some time near that palace. Some of us were fast in climbing, they lead us. Arvind was the main attraction of the trek; this was his tenth trek to Tadiyandamol. He has a fare amount of experience that he shared with us and sometimes he was silent. He is very much supporting and encouraging the group.

Our second resting point was a rock, it’s around half way I seems. There is a water stream near by, we filled our bottles. It was really amazing to jump over the rocks and to up the stream with Jene John. The shape and various colours of rocks with small trees and shrubs grown on both sides gave spectacular scenery to that stream. Water was really cold and the rocks are slippery too. After thirty minutes of rest, we resumed our walk. The remaining part was hard and at the same time most beautiful… we felt steepness slowly increased that we couldn’t step easily from one leg to another. I was trying to enjoy jumping from one stone to another… the pack moved steadily and in a rhythm.., half way, when we reached a fence made of stones, we had some biscuits and chocolates… quantity was more than enough. With in five minutes, we entered the jungle, it looks to be rain forest and the path was narrow… We couldn’t see any animals there, but Aravind said we could see elephants in summer (April, May) as they come down in search of water.

With in one hour, we conquered the peak.. time was 12.20 pm. The peak is approximately 7Km from the palace bus stopWe could see all around, Arvind was naming the near by peaks..sorry I don’t remember their names. He explained his terrible experiences he had in one his three days trek in 1980’s. One major attraction of the peak was the 360 degree view since it is the tallest among the near by peaks. One main scene was a bird, which kept balancing in air for minutes. I don’t remember its name though. We had full fledged lunch there; every one shared their own packs among all of us. Food was surplus but we managed to complete it and it was interesting to see every one caring to keep plastic and other wastes in a separate cover.

We started moving down by 2pm. I felt it was more difficult to move down and is hard to balance. We found time to spend some time in the stream near that rock. We reached bus stop by 5.15pm. Every thing went fine as scheduled till now. Reached Madikkeri by 7.30 pm. We had our dinner there, visited one temple there. We returned Bangalore by 11pm.

It was really a wonderful experience to spent one day in this trek. There is lot more to conquer in nature.

Monday, November 06, 2006

Calculating Relative Humidity in software

Humidity specifies the amount of water content in the atmosphere and relative humidity(RH) is a means of specifying it. Famous method to know relative humidity is comparing the readings of a dry and wet thermometer. This technique is known for even a school student. Actually RH is dependent on the atmosphere pressure also.

In many applications, there are requirements to monitor RH and it is easy if we apply this dry-wet bulb thermometer approach. One way of implementing this is by putting a 2D look up table where dry and wet thermometer readings are its indexes. But this approach will be cumbersome since it is difficult to include pressure vector too.

Best approach will be using the equation using which, we can find the RH directly. This is very reliable and requires less code space compared to earlier method. Looking at the practical implementation, just read the temperatures from dry and wet electronic thermometers and use those values to evaluate RH.

Equation for RH is,

A = 0.00066*(1+0.0011*Twet);
eSwet = exp((16.78*Twet - 116.9)/(Twet + 237.3));
ed = eSwet - A*Pr*(Tdry-Twet);
eSdry = exp((16.78*Tdry - 116.9)/(Tdry + 237.3));
RH = (ed/eSdry) * 100;

Where A is a correction factor and Pr = 101.325 is the normal sea level pressure.
Tdry and Twet are in celcius scale.

This equation can be implemented easily in 8051 or AVR or any other microcontroller without much effort and code space. Actually earlier I thought exponential functions will eat up my uC memory, but when I tried it, it works very fine!!!

This approach of making humidity sensor is cheaper than buying an electronic humidity sensor.

Web Resources for Quran Studies

Lots of web pages are available to study and understand Quran. Below are some of them that I found very useful among them,

1. Arabic text only:
2. English only translation:
3. Seven transilations in a single page!!!

Saturday, November 04, 2006

Polygamy in world religions and cultures

Polygamy was accepted in Hebrew society, in classical China and was prevalent in many traditional African and Polynesian cultures. In India it was practiced from ancient times itself. In ancient Greece, prior to Roman Catholic Church, it was accepted. Messianic Christianity allowed and still allows polygamy.

Polygamy was practiced most of the prophets depicted in bible (David, Moses, Solomon etc) and was practiced throughout the time of New Testament up to 11th century. Currently it is estimated that there are as many as 80,000 non-mormon Christian polygynysts in US itself!!

Polygamy and polyandry (having more than one husband for a woman) were practiced in ancient Hindu society. An address by Bhishma to Yudhishtira in Mahabharata goes like this: "A Brahmana can take three wives. A Kshatriya can take two wives. As regards the Vaishya, he should take a wife from only his own order. The children born of these wives should be regarded as equal." (Anusasana Parva, Section XLIV). Manu Samhita clearly says that all classes including Brahmins are allowed to have more than one wife. For example, Manu say:

A Brahmin's first wife is to come from a Brahmin family, yet his second wife can be from either Brahmin family or Ksatriya. His third wife can be from either Brahmin, Ksatriya or Vaishya. His fourth wife can be from any class, including that of Sudra. Although some speculate that the Brahmin class were never allowed more than one wife, this is not at all supported in the Manu Samhita or in various Vedic scriptures where there are stories of many Brahmin sages who are said to have more than one wife.

In more recent history, the founder Acharya of the International Society for Krishna Consciousness, A.C Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada who was popular in 1970’s and known as religious ambassador from India, many times cited the need in socirty for the acceptance and practice of polygamy for the purpose of protecting all women cia proper religious marriage.

In China polygamy was legal till 1911, after which Ching dynasty banned it through a law. Confucianism which is a major religion in China allowed polygamy. Confucianism has stressed the ability of managing ones family of several wives. In the book of Great Learning (Daxue) wrote, "a man can first manage himself, then manage a family (of more than one set of wives & offsprings), then he can manage a small country, and then, he shall be able to unify and manage a nation."

US banned polygamy in 1890. It was allowed in the early Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (Mormon –LDS) church, but was ended in 189o after government coercion was given that prohibited Utah from becoming a state as long as they allowed Polygamy. The situation seen from US after banning polygamy in US and other countries were pathetic. People started having illegal relations with women and maintained them as under various names- ex-wife, secret wife, concubine etc. this has created a state of uncertainty in the society where people become less loyal to their relationships and the moral value declined a lot.

If we look at Hong Kong, Taiwan, China and Macau, in all of these countries the law banned polygamy and people used to have extra relationships across the border. This is called cross-border polygamy as widely discussed. Mongolia is currently rethinking on allowing polygamy because of gender imbalance.

If we analyze any region on earth, there had or has some form of polygamy prevailed or prevailing currently. But whenever it is banned, people utilized it illegally and it paved a way for prostitution and illegal marriage where there is no limitation for wives.

Having said all these, there are certain situations where polygamy will become a useful method to tackle some dangerous situations. In any society, there may arise a situation where females out number males because of many reasons. In today’s context, a reason may be wars or fights. It is common that men actively participate in those fights and passes away leaving a family aside. Look the case in Chechnya. Now there are more females than males. The only way to bring up the society back to a stable state is through polygamy. And we have to keep in mind that, sexual desire is human and natural and what will happen to this society if those women are not taken care by society.

In the case of Islam, it has a put a clear clause on this issue. If we study the situation existed in Arabian Peninsula during the time of Prophet Muhammad, people used to have immense number of wives. This caused a practice of uncertainty in the society where in people started marrying woman just for joy and men were not serious about the aftermaths too. This shows that “living in extremes is difficult and hazardous for a society”. In this circumstance Islam put forward a medium path where it restricted the number of wives to be a maximum of four with a strict condition. You can read it from a verse from Quran as shown below,

“And if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, marry [their mothers] that are lawful to you, two, three, four; but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly [with them], then only one, or those which your right hands possess. That will be more suitable to prevent you from doing injustice. And give these women their dowers also the way dowers are given; but if they, of their own good pleasure, remit any part of it to you, take it and consume it gladly.” (4:3-4)

So Islam allowed Polygamy but with a strict conditions. It teaches that man has to get an approval from his wife or wives for a new marriage. At the same time it has clear cut views on the relationships between couples, family members, how to behave with parents etc. All that meant from these is making a healthy society. It has banned prostitution and an Islamic state can take necessary action against someone depending on the evidence, if that state has firstly taken steps to prevent prostitution and maintain a state of calmness in that society. In between we have to realize that there are many conditions that have to be fulfilled in Islamic Juridical system before taking or commanding a punishment.

What is happening in societies where polygamy is illegal? People seek to find out other ways and it formed a state of insecurity. It can be evidently see that prostitution is very less in Arabian countries compared to other world countries (I am not supporting the law or governance of Arabian countries completely here. There are many dimensions that I seriously criticize against those countries though. We can discuss this topic later if you are interested). And surely this has helped to attain a healthy situation in those societies although they lack in many other things.

Note: This articles includes excerpts from various web pages in addition to my own thoughts.

Mind of a Terrorist

We are in a world where there are many discussions are undergoing and tactics are applied to check Terrorism and it is a fact that Islam is being portryaed as a supplier of Terrorism. I would like to give some thoughts for you in this regrad, admitting that there are many situations where people fight in the name of religion, but that is not the actual way.

From the Islamic perspective, islam can’t support any military operation unless it is taken by an Islamic government as a strategic fight against other country. And Quran clearly says killing an innocent person is same as killing the whole of the man kind. And it also denies killing women and children who are usually not a part of the war.

But fighting against soldiers who are involved in the battle is a way of fight. So in this respect the fighting and resistance in Palestine against Israel soldiers is a true fight for their home land, agreeing that Palastines has committed so many faults in their fight. Considering the basic reasons, they are fighting for the freedom of their motherland.

I would like to share some thoughts particularly on suicide bombings. This issue has many serious and significant dimensions that, I think, most of us haven’t thought on. I would like to summarize some things…

1. Suicide bombing is not a monopoly act that is practiced only by muslims. It is an agreed fact that, this brutal way of fight is first innovated and utilized by LTTE in Srilanka, later it spread over to Palestine, Afghan and now to Iraq. There in an Indian Intelligence report that LTTE militants are training Maoists in Nepal and Bihar, near Nepal boarder. In Lebanon in the 1980s, of those suicide attackers, only eight were Islamic fundamentalists. Twenty-seven were Communists and Socialists. Three were Christians. This means that mind of a suicide bomber is not nurtured by a specific religion ideology but there are other things that drive them along …what is that?

2. If you analyze around the globe, we can realize that suicide bombers are seen in areas where other countries invade and deploy their troops. They use suicide bombs as a tactical means to threaten the political regime and pressurize them so that they will leave their homeland. They say that the rebel leader, Velupillai Prabhakaran, runs a highly-disciplined organization in which suicide attacks are seen as a vital part of the struggle to establish an independent Tamil state. In these cases, suicide bombers target more count in mortality, so that will have more influence on the government or invading troops. For example, once US troops went back from Lebanon, Hisbulla terminated the path of suicide bombings. Actually before that, Hizbulla had campaigned for suicide bombings. After that Hizbulla was become a political party.

3. Look at Iraq, before US invasion; there is no evidence of having suicide bombers in Iraq. If suicide bombing is motivated by Islam, it should be seen from Iran and Saudi Arabia. Iran has three times muslim population compared to Iraq. But there is no suicide bombings happening in Iran. This means invasion and occupation from a foreign land matters as it is a feeling of fight for freedom of one’s homeland.

4. Coming to the Arabian Peninsula, there are more than 150000 US troops there and people living there understand it as a serious strategic risk for their country’s security. So in this regard, they will fight to close down those camps. And the peculiarity with most Arabian and Middle East countries is that, the ruling regime will be supporting the invaders for many reasons. So people or a group of people resists this invasion. Whenever there is a direct support from the government, invaders can’t enter the country easily. That is what the situation in Iraq and Cuba. So it is natural that there will be more conflicts in this area.

5. And many of these suicide bombers are involved in this because of their life experiences. In their case, their family members or close relatives may be murdered due to military operations and in opposition; they find suicide bombing as an easy way to react. In these cases also religion doesn’t matter a lot.

You could hear similar kind of thoughts from many scholars and historians. One among them is Robert Pope. He explains his views in his book “Dying to Win – Logic of suicide Terrorism”. If you have time, please read below two pages…

So from all of these, I understand spread of suicide bombing in today’s context as a psychological resistance from a group of people. All this doesn’t mean that I completely support suicide bombing…rather I was trying to read the minds of a suicide bomber.

As a human and talking from a muslim stand point, we can’t support bombings in Mumbai since it is completely a terrorist act killing innocent people, whatever may be the reasons and explanations given. But use of suicide bombing in Palestine is for a noble cause… it is not terrorism… it is a resistance and fight for freedom of homeland. That means suicide bombing can be used as a method of fighting like any other method (fighting with sword, bombs, mines…) if the war is for a noble cause and is valid.

Having said all these, I would suggest a peaceful way of fighting as an alternative for fighting like Tibetans do against Chinese tortures. But it depends on many things. How can a Palestinian just stand when Israel bombs and strikes on them? So modes of resistance depends on the situation, demography etc.

There are many other factors which matters in this topic itself… we can argue them later if discussion continues… Hope, opinions that are shared is clear to you and if any clarification is needed, I am happy to discuss and if there is any error you can point out it and more than happy to correct it. And if there is any opinion that you can’t realize lets discuss here peacefully for our goodness.

May GOD help us to understand the truth!!!

Note: This articles includes excerpts from various web pages in addition to my own thoughts.